Staying Calm in the Moment: 3 Tips for Caregivers Navigating Frustration

Caring for someone with dementia can be deeply meaningful, but it can also be emotionally exhausting. Some days feel manageable. Others may leave you feeling overwhelmed, exhausted, or frustrated with the person you’re trying so hard to support.

These feelings are completely normal. When tension builds, having a few practical tools to stay grounded can make a real difference, both for your well-being and for your loved one’s experience.

In a previous Caregiver Coaching Tip from Alexandra Kaplan, MA (Gerontology), Lead Caregiver Coach at Institute on Aging’s Compania, shares three helpful ways to stay calm when emotions run high.

1. Pause, Breathe, and Reset

When frustration surfaces, your first reaction doesn’t have to be your final one. Step back, take a deep breath, and give yourself permission to reset. Even a short break can create space to respond thoughtfully instead of reacting with stress.

2. Focus on Emotion, Not Words

If your loved one says something hurtful or confusing, try not to take it personally. Focus on the emotion behind the words. Many behaviors are attempts to express needs or feelings that can’t be clearly communicated. When you respond to the emotion instead of the behavior, you make room for compassion and connection.

“Try your best not to take it personally and remind yourself that oftentimes behaviors are a form of communication”

– Alexandra Kaplan

3. Build in Short Breaks and Ask for Help

Caregiving is not a sprint. It is a long journey that requires rest, support, and balance. Taking just 10 to 15 minutes for yourself each day or week can go a long way. Whether it’s a walk, a quiet moment, or asking a friend for help, every small act of care for yourself helps build resilience.

If you’re feeling overwhelmed or unsure how to manage tough moments with your loved one, Compania is here for you. We offer dementia care coaching, in-home support, and day programs that meet families where they are and provide the help they need.

Contact the Compania team to learn more about personalized caregiver support: ioadementiacare.org.